Want to annoy your wife – these tips will help
1. Start asking her questions (don’t mistakenly do anything) about cooking, cleaning and laundry. Say, I think its time I learn to take care of myself. You know, just in case.
2. Volunteer to cook for her. Make sure it’s really greasy. Use every pot and pan in the house and be sure you spill and/or drop some of everything everywhere.
3. While brushing your teeth, flick the toothbrush first at the sink and then at the mirror.
4. Never ask her to get you something from the kitchen when she’s in the kitchen. Let her spend a good 30 minutes in there and when she reaches the sofa with a sigh of relief say, “Will you PLEASE do me a big favor and get me a beer, my back is just killing me today.”
5. Be sure to load up all your pockets with tissues before you drop them in the washing basket.
6. Leave yourself a trail of clothing, towels, dishes, and everything else you put your hands on. This will ensure you never lose your way.
7. Wait until she’s overwhelmed with work and lean in close and say, “Did you see how dusty the leaves on your house plants are?”
8. Put on a TV program and them pretend to keep falling asleep. Wake up each time she tries to change the channel and say, “Damn it, you know how much I looked forward to watching this. Don’t be so selfish.”
9. Wait until she is totally engrossed in a movie then tell her something is bugging you and you really need to talk about it. Be sure it’s as stupid, boring, and long winded as you can make it.
10. Wait until she’s finally lost a few pounds on that diet. Start having uncontrollable urges for her favorite sin foods. When she repeatedly declines, stick it in her face anyway and say, “Oh stop it! A little X isn’t going to hurt you.”
More 10 tricks tommorrow … so come again
Tags: Wife SMS